Gray Flannel Dwarf


Who says halloween isn’t scary?

Well, I got my halloween scare…

I head into Herndon with kewlnonutz, her fiancee and 1nvrknoz for dinner. Driving back from Amphora, going down the road… I specifically remember seeing the speed limit sign of 30, and knowing that you’re an idiot if you drive dumb in herndon because of the cops, I wasn’t really anything above 34 or so.
I come to the intersection of Sterling road w/ Herndon Parkway, look down the road for traffic, make my right hand turn… I get about 25 yards down herndon parkway and cop lights come on. I am immediately completely befuddled. I couldn’t figure it out.

I pull over, roll down the window, officer asks for the license and reg… i have 1nvrknoz look for it, cuz it was on his side somewhere… the cop is like, “do you know why I pulled you over? ” and I was nervous and preoccupied trying to figure out just why he pulled me over. I had no idea at all, I couldn’t figure it out, meanwhile, i kept fumbling with words and stuff, so he asked me to get out of the car.. and we still hadn’t found the registration, but the cop said not to worry about it.

Talking w/ him on the sidewalk, still nervous, he had to tell me twice to take my hands outta my pockets, something I was doing as reflex. Then this conversation occurred.

Him: “did you see where you stopped at that intersection?”
Me: “uh… not precisely, but it seemed normal to me”
Him: “You stopped too far out”

Me: Wha…?
Him: Yeah, you were way out there, you were in the intersection”
Me (thinking): ain’t no way… if anything, I had to pull forward to see around that bend to check if anyone was coming down the road. Besides, he was behind me, how the hell would he know?

Me, (reiterating): “I really didn’t see that officer, it certainly felt like i was outside the intersection”
Him: “You also went down that road at a high rate of speed”

Me: Sir, I am certain I was not speeding–
Him: I didn’t say you were speeding, I said you were at a high rate of speed, I thought you were going to go right through that intersection
Me: ???

After that, he asked where I was coming from (Amphora), if I’d had anything to drink (no), where I was heading (home), and if I’d ever been arrested (no). Then he gave me my license and told me to go home.

Herndon cops are a bunch of dicks, really. This marks about the third time I’ve been in a car that was pulled over for no reason in that town.

cswiii @ 12:45 am

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